Academy Awards 2015

I have to admit, I'm a little off-kilter this time around. We were at a lovely dinner with family during the red carpet, and I feel like only seeing the dresses in pictures (and the brief glimpses during the show itself) is maybe skewing my judgment? However, I've put in an absurd amount of time looking at recaps today to try to overcome this deficit. Let us soldier on.

 I SAY NAY:

So there's a teeny tiny chance that I might be wrong, but when I saw how Nicole Kidman was standing all night I felt like tall girls everywhere knew what was up. She seemed to be standing/hunching in the way that you do when you feel like your dress is too short, and you're trying to get an extra half inch out of it. The hem, while obviously intentional, only bolstered my theory by reminding me of every pair of pants I owned from 7-9th grade...hems let out to eke out an extra inch.

I'm not even going to get into the dress itself, except to say it's bad.

This looks SO UNCOMFORTABLE. I want to know how Laura Dern was able to sit. That's all.

Solange Knowles is gorgeous, and way more stylish than her sister (yeah, I said it). But there is no rationalization for the snuggie-with-pants situation that's happening here.

GETTING THERE:

Loved the drama and the color, but hated the top. So....nice skirt, Felicity Jones? She seems to have a penchant for the mock turtleneck style and has worn it on a few red carpets, but paired with that extreme cut-in it makes even an English rose look like a bit of a Hulk. Oh man, I feel like a jerk saying that about someone who seems so happy. 

I need help on this one, because I happen to have an irrational antipathy toward Anna Kendrick and it might be clouding my judgment. She looks pretty, but at the same time, her dress looks like a prom dress. Yes? No? Would I instantly love it on Jennifer Lawrence?

(Ok, I just pictured it on JLaw and it seemed even more like a prom dress. I think I'm right about this one.)

Such a gorgeous dress and hair for Emma Stone (like Downton Abbey goes to a party at Jay Gatsby's)...but the color. I truly think any color in a Crayola 96 box would be better than this one. And matching shoes in the same offensive color certainly don't help. But you can just see the potential of the dress and I hope it shows up on another red carpet in a different shade.

THAT'LL DO:

Reese Witherspoon looked amazing. She must have known she wasn't going to win, but she definitely dressed as though she were ready to trot up to the stage if need be. I mean, "trotting" would be hard in a dress that impeccably fitted, but you know what I mean. She would sedately sashayed her way on to the "Best Dressed Oscar Winners" list.

Cate Blanchett - making everyone else look silly in their spring colors in February. The velvet is absolutely gorgeous, and I adored the necklace. What's with everyone wearing the same borrowed jewelry, anyway? If I had cases of choices at my disposal, I'd like to think I'd do what Cate's stylist did and think outside of the diamond bangles.

Oh, and I waffled a bit on the eyelash-trim edging on the dress...but in the end it's Cate, and she can do what she wants.

I'll happily sound like a broken record when it comes to Lupita Nyong'o. She never chooses a cookie-cutter dress, and it always pays off. I don't even know how her female colleagues felt when they saw her arrive in a dress entirely covered in pearls, that still somehow managed to be streamlined and not costume-y...but I like to think that they graciously applauded and quietly murmured, "Of course."

All right, who did I miss? Any favorites egregiously overlooked? Any worst-dressed who slipped by me (Gaga doesn't count)?