post-Oscar party

Let me first say, that I have a healthy dose of appreciation for these actresses. They are all beautiful, and I usually look like a mess, and while not all great actors, they can at least speak in public without getting tied up in their words, which is more than I can do. Having thus complimented them and insulted myself, I feel like I am allowed to go ahead and critique their fashion choices. My thoughts basically boil down to: "Was that a warmup? Where are the real Oscars?" I've got to say, as someone who gets very excited about observing glamour from the comfort of her own sweatpants and couch, last night was just sort of...meh. It was like most of them decided to take the night off. There were, of course, some exceptions [thumbs up, girls!] Let's look at them all, shall we?



I think everyone I knew wore this dress (or contemplated wearing it) to prom within the last decade. Also, her hair is so over-the-top that in conjunction with the dress, she looks like a vintage Barbie. However, I may or may not have an appreciation for vintage Barbies.



Oh hello there. I understand you're new and all, but did no one explain to you that these are the Academy Awards? Wearing a Calvin Klein tank dress with beach hair and one bracelet is not going to cut it. Come on...even Hailee Steinfeld caught on quickly...and she's like 14.



Holy goodness, Amy Adams, I love you. The navy is so so perfect with her skin and hair, and the cut was one of the more interesting ones of the night. The only thing that made me sad was the necklace over the high collar...that should never happen. But I loved her.



Speaking of the perfect color for your skin tone, Mila's lavender was lah-ver-ly.



Grr. Natalie Portman, you irk me. You're beautiful, but your previews freaked me out all fall, and now you wear a "full-length" gown that shows your feet. With that sort of draping, we shouldn't be able to know that your shoes perfectly match your dress. Go marry your dancer man and have a beautiful baby, and we'll see how I'm feeling after that.

And because I need to wrap this up sometime, last night's MVP was...



Queen Anne. I go back and forth on her generally, but every one of her 42 [or whatever] outfit changes last night was gorgeous. She looked amazing...and her singing "On My Own" definitely solidified my vote.

[Honorable mention goes to Mandy Moore for her AWESOME cobalt Monique Lhuillier dress she wore while singing. I squealed. Dyeing a wedding dress blue has never worked so well. Go find it.]