far-away family

As I mentioned, my middle sister just had adorable twin girls. And today Alison, my cousin, maid of honor, and inseparable for 20+ years had twin boys! This is obviously a very happy time for our family, and we're feeling sort of dazed from all of the blessings.

But it turns out (spoiler alert) that bringing those very loved babies into the world is sometimes a complicated, worrisome thing. So while I've been happily glued to my phone for the past few weeks, I've also felt very far apart from my family. For an oldest child (and self-appointed "mom" of our tight group of cousins) it's been hard to feel like I can't do anything to help, and that I'm missing important moments. I mean, not labor-and-delivery-hard, but still...not exactly fun.

One thing that's helped, as silly and materialistic as it sounds, is this ring. My friend (and college coach's wife) made it for me this spring out of pieces I already had. The emeralds came from a ring passed on from my grandma (who also has a May birthday, so we share this birthstone) and earrings from my parents on my 13th birthday.

I love that it looks like an heirloom, because I feel like it really is. Yes, it's new. But it's also intrinsically old, and reminds me of the stories and history of our family. We are a strong family who loves each other very much, and I know that none of us doubts that, and that it can be felt across the country. And if something concrete like a ring helps me remember that, I won't beat myself up to much...we're only human. Sometimes being able to touch something makes all the difference.